Thursday, October 25, 2007

10 things, seemingly unrelated

1. My new deodorant has caused a scorching red rash on both my armpits. Sorry, Mitchum Smart Solid Anti-Perspirant. My little black dress may approve of you, but I do not.

2. While trimming the lavender bush in my front yard, I saw a weed sticking out. So I reached over and gave it a firm yank. When thorns sank into my skin, I realized it was not a weed at all, but in fact it was a miniature rose bush, living back there in a thicket of darkness, where nobody even knew it existed. So I cut the lavender way back, tied the little guy to a thin green pole, and waited. Three weeks later, there are six or seven bright red blooms, and I swear to god it's six inches taller. I ask you, how often in life does one find a rosebush one never knew one had?

3. My favorite new drink: Grey Goose on the rocks, with a splash of pineapple juice. Try it. It's perfect. Not too boozy, not too sugary, the perfect sipping cocktail.

4. The big diet began this week (evidently training for a half-marathon doesn't help you lose even one puny little ounce of weight), so when someone handed me a fun-size bag of peanut M&Ms yesterday, I looked up the nutritional value on my favorite weight-loss web site. Six M&Ms = 110 calories, 5 grams of fat. FOR SIX M&MS.

5. Seems Ugg boots are trying to make a comeback. Can that really be? They were awful the first time. GODawful. Get back to your ugly arctic ice cave, Uggs!

6. I toy with the idea of buying Except I don't know how. And I wouldn't know what to do next. I don't know how to transfer content from this blog to another one. And also, I want my own logo at the top of my page. And a clever little blurb to put under the title. And how can I get my stupid e-mail address over on the left to show up as a link instead of plain text? I'm also sick of looking at the Blogger templates I use, so I want a new one of those, too.

7. When you are too tired for real cooking: Mix two cans of Rotel tomatoes and peppers, one can of corn, one can of fat-free refried beans, one can of chicken broth, and one package of precooked chicken breast, broken into chunks. Heat for 30 minutes, then serve, with a sprinkle of cheddar cheese. Hearty and nutritious.

8. My husband and I are on vacation next week. Big plans include cleaning the gutters, organizing the garage and office, figuring out how to use the fireplace, painting the bathroom, visiting the Body Worlds exhibit at the Tech Museum, and having a fabulously extravagant meal at a four-star restaurant.

9. Last night, Chickenbone jumped up into my lap and barfed all over my pajamas. I'm not even sure it's possible for a dog to look mortified, but I'm telling you, he did.

10. A Halloween joke I learned as a kid:
Q: Why couldn't the witch have babies?
A: Because of popcorn balls and hollow weenies.


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