Friday, February 6, 2009

This is sort of cheating

Hi there. Sorry I haven't been around, but I was busy getting jacked up by the bloody, gory insanity of the month that was January. In addition to putting the wraps on a couple of life-or-death projects at work and hosting a party of 70 people at my house, I was also writing this (which as you can see required MANY hours of grueling research) and preparing for the next column, which I turned in today. So, that was January.

But anyhow, today my graphic designer couldn't get a hold of me on the phone, so she sends me this e-mail with the subject line "CALL ME OR ELSE..." and on the inside of the e-mail it said "... you'll never see your little dog again!"

With this picture:



Clearly stolen off my blog and sent through the Photoshop machine. Hilarious. But then I was like CRAP! The fricking BLOG! So here I am, and here comes the cheating part, where I post my 25 random things from Facebook. (Actually, this proud MediaNews alum shall refer to it a "content-sharing opportunity.") It was really fun to write, and they're cool to read - I must have devoured dozens of other people's lists. You should totally do one. And since I know how SOME PEOPLE are still being ridiculously stubborn FB holdouts (I'm talkin' to you, you know who you are) technically it might still be new content. For someone. Anyway. Here you are.

25 RANDOM THINGS ABOUT ME

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are encouraged to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose up to 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

To do this, go to Notes under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.

1. When I was little, I told people I would drive a Jaguar when I grew up, because that’s what Angela Bower drove on "Who's the Boss?"

2. I have twirled a baton in a parade.

3. One of my first favorite songs was "Manic Monday," but I recorded it off the radio and missed the first two lines. So I memorized "blue Italian stream, but I can't be late..." It was so cool when like 10 years later I finally heard the full
intro.

4. I had three hamsters when I was young; Peabody, who lived three years, Socrates, who lived for a month, and Fenwick, who lived two weeks.

5. I always listen to music in the kitchen, and when my very favorite songs come on, I pick up my dog and sing to him while we dance around.

6. I wish my 30s could last forever.

7. I have three distinct memories of living in Phoenix: racing out to the ice cream truck to buy cinnamon toothpicks; watching "The Three Stooges" with my dad after school; and collecting tiny seashells off the playground after it had been irrigated.

8. I know I shouldn't have smoked, but the truth is, some of the most important (and often most difficult) conversations of my life unfolded over a pack of cigarettes.

9. When I'm not feeling well, the only thing I want to eat is spiral macaroni and cheese (spiral, not elbow) and diet 7-up.

10. The first person I ever knew who died was a third-grader named Guillermo Castorena. We called him Memo. His dad came to his house in the middle of the night and shot him and his three siblings, and all the children died but one. He also shot the mom three times. A year later, I was horrified to learn the mom and dad got back together, and she stood at his side in court.

11. I have never had a cavity.

12. When I was in third grade, I organized an act for a school talent show in which my friends and I sang "All Out of Love." (I was kind of a cheeseball.) I had to listen to the song a bunch of times to write down all the lyrics, and I must have listened to the line "tormented and torn apart" a dozen times before I finally knew what the hell he was saying. It was a real "Eureka!" moment.

13. One time I ran away. I packed a bag full of saltine crackers, underwear, and my dad’s glass thermos full of water. I got two blocks before a dog barked and scared me, and I dropped the bag and shattered the glass. That scared me even more, so I went home.

14. I love to read recipes, menus and cookbooks.

15. Starlight mints remind me of two special men in my life: my father-in-law, who once worked in a starlight mint factory; and my father, who would sometimes leave one on my dresser at night and then pretend to have no knowledge of where it came from. This mystery delighted me for months.

16. Five years ago, I was more than $20,000 in credit-card debt. Then a true friend (you know who you are) nudged me toward a very good credit counseling service, and three years later, I had paid it all off.

17. I don't struggle with my weight because I'm bored, depressed, unaware, or lacking in self-control. I struggle because I love to cook, order and devour incredibly delicious food.

18. I can't stand pointless office small talk, i.e. two colleagues passing each other in the hallway with a "Hi, how are you?!" "Good, how are you?!" "Good!" "Good!" Guh.

19. The practice of writing is pure torture for me, but I love having written.

20. I get mad when people say Sarah Jessica Parker is ugly.

21. My lifelong hatred of onions began to crumble when I went out to eat with a restaurant critic and I didn’t want to look like a wuss. The onions I ate were purple, and not so bad.

22. In the fourth grade, there was a fat kid named Garrett who used to chase me and try to kiss me. He always wore a pea-green shirt and had fuzzy brown hair. When I complained to my teacher, he replied, "Well, if you stop running, he won’t chase you!" I was appalled that an adult could be so dumb.

23. I dream of visiting exotic locales, like a rainforest or arctic tundra.

24. I love how my husband still surprises me, all the time.

25. I mentally composed much of this list this morning during spin class.